Thursday, 16 March 2017

Home Alone

Harry has been away for a week on a boys-only trip across the Channel. Not so very long ago, communication would have meant a phone call or two at an exorbitant rate on a line blighted by static. Nowadays, it's so much easier to keep in touch, with text messaging, phone calls and FaceTime, all from a gadget held in your hand. It was in a FaceTime call towards the end of Harry's sojourn that he told me he couldn't wait to get home and take me across his knee. His palm was itching and we weren't even in the same country!

He got home very late on Saturday night and spent most of Sunday catching up on sleep and other pressing needs, so it wasn't until Monday morning that his itchy palm was relieved, by giving me a delicious 'just because I'm back' spanking. Afterwards, he warned me there'd be a reset when he got home from work. There's nothing like it for setting my world to rights and maintaining my equilibrium. Since then, it has been reminders twice a day, once before he goes to work and again on his return. It's no coincidence that he is working twelve days straight, which always makes me edgy. I'm not complaining though, I waited 43 years for that first spank to fall!

I went to a party during Harry's absence but, apart from that, life was uneventful. Luckily, there's another meme: 

Early bird or a night person?
I am not a morning person. I'm not really a night owl either, I just stay up too late.

Vanilla, chocolate or strawberry?
Haagen-Dazs strawberry cheesecake.

Summer person or winter person?
Summer. When the clocks go back in October, I just want to hibernate until spring.

Hearty breakfast or just coffee?
Light breakfast with two cups of tea. Coffee comes later.

Bright or muted colours?
Neutral, with pops of colour for contrast.

Pie or cake?
Cake, preferably chocolate with buttercream icing. 

Seaside vacation or fun in a big resort or city?
City breaks for sightseeing, seaside for relaxation.



Dog or cat lover?
I've had both but cats have the edge.

Short or long hair?
Chin length.

Leather or wood?
Leather, wood is no good.

Baseball or football fan?
Not really a sports fan but I do like to watch the Six Nations Rugby. England won the 2017 tournament.

Spa day or shopping with a friend?
Spa day with a friend. Better still, spa stay with a friend.

Live concert or movie?
Live concert. I love to see all the old bands. I've seen Bryan Ferry more than 20 times.




Wrap a gift with paper and bow or use a gift bag?
Depends on the shape of the gift.

Help build a snowman or stay inside and make the hot chocolate?
I hate snow.

Four seasons or California climate?
Four seasons. It's not always raining in England, though it sometimes seems that way.

Driver or passenger?
Driving is a necessary evil as far as I'm concerned. I have to do it but I'd rather be in the passenger seat.

Pyjamas or nightgown?
I don't own any night wear.

Bake a cake or go to your favourite bakery?
Bake a cake.

Valentine's cake for Harry


Theatre night - musical or drama?
I'm not crazy about musicals but the last thing I saw at a theatre was 'Chicago'.

Thanks to Abby for circulating this one.


Rosie

Thursday, 23 February 2017

At Last!

I thought Harry and I were never going to be free of the dreaded lurgy but, fingers crossed, we have recovered at last.There has been a fair bit of spanky business going on as life returns to normal, most notably Saturday's reset and yesterday's 'just because'. I have to admit that the reset was overdue. It came to a head on Saturday morning. I was out of sorts  and was poking the bear. I know! That never ends well but I failed to notice the danger signs until the bear growled. We had to head out for our regular gym session but he told me I was going to get such a spanking when we got back. And I did.

The 'just because' was unexpected. Here's how it was announced:


That made me all melty and the anticipation put a smile on my face for the rest of the afternoon. Harry came home early but I still had to wait until the appointed time!

Life is uneventful at the moment and that's the way I like it. It means I've nothing to blog about though. Fortunately, there are a couple of memes circulating at the moment. Here's my take on Lilli's.

Who's older?
Harry, by 20 months.

Who was interested first?
We couldn't stand each other when we first met. I was shocked when I realised he was "The One". It took me ten months to reel him in with my feminine wiles. 

Same High School?
No, I was at an all girls' school.

More sensitive?
Me, I suppose.

Worst temper?
I'm told Harry has a temper but I've never seen it. I, on the other hand, have been known to smash crockery.

More social?
Neither of us is really social, but I'm the social organiser. We would never go out if it were left to him.

Most stubborn?
Harry, for sure. He's generally laid back but once he digs his heels in he's as immovable as a rock.

Wakes up first?
Harry. I am not a morning person.

Bigger family?
Mine. Both my parents came from big families.

Flowers?
I buy flowers every week for the house and Harry gives me lots of flowers throughout the year, not just special occasions. These were a birthday present from the daughter who lives a million miles away.




Who cooks the most?
I do, by a small margin.

Cries more?
Neither of us is much of a crier.

Said "I love you" first?
Harry did. I still remember the exact date.

Better singer?
Harry. I can't sing a note.

Better driver?
Harry, no doubt about it. I can drive but I'm inept at parking.


Hogs the remote?
Harry does. It's a man thing isn't it?

Better cook?
I'm more experienced but he's more inventive. I'd say we're even.

Clothes and shoes hoarder?
That would be me. Not just clothes and shoes but handbags too. Handbags are my weakness.


Thank you Lilli for passing on this meme.

Rosie 

Thursday, 2 February 2017

Stop the Clock!


Here we are in February already. Where did January go? I feel as though I blinked and missed it somehow. It's several weeks since I last posted and I must apologise for not answering comments on my last post.

I didn't mean to be away so long. My absence was precipitated by a ridiculous thing that happened to me in the checkout queue in Sainsbury's on the morning of Christmas Eve. I was standing patiently behind Harry as he loaded our goods onto the belt - he has his own method, I don't mess with it - when I was overcome with a violent coughing fit and WHAM! Pain ripped across my lower back and I couldn't move. I thought it was just a bad flare but after a  couple of days I realised it was a fresh injury. I'm not going to bang on about it, once the damage is done it's all about pain management through exercise, medication and rest. It didn't ruin the Christmas and New Year holidays, the break just didn't go as planned. There wasn't much we couldn't work around, though I had to forego the traditional pink Champagne on Christmas morning so that I could get drugged up to cook dinner and I also missed being spanked to the chimes of Big Ben on New Year's Eve. 

Spanking may have been off the agenda but ttwd was firmly in place. Harry was extra attentive, making sure there was no slacking with the exercises and reminding me to rest. On the third day, Boxing Day, I levered myself up from the floor after exercising and managed to twist my left wrist in the process. I am right-handed but my left hand is the one that holds my iPad - disaster! Harry thought it would be a good thing to be parted from it for a while. I managed to dabble a bit in social media on my phone but it's too small for reading the newspaper or blogs.

It was frustrating not to be able to shower or dress by myself for several days. At times, before ttwd, I have chafed at being so dependent on Harry, pushing back against being mollycoddled, but this time it was curiously freeing to let go and lean in to him. He took over completely, doing most of the cooking and other chores as well as looking after me. Our elder daughter and her partner came to stay for a few days to celebrate Harry's birthday and make a shopping trip to London. Harry insisted on cooking his own birthday meal, firmly shooing everyone out of the kitchen. I did manage to make his birthday cake the day before, though.

By the end of the holidays I was starting to mend and Harry went back to work. A couple of days later, I felt confident enough to make the short drive to the salon for a haircut. Harry noticed the hairdo when he came home and asked how my back was. I said it had felt a lot better that day and he said "Oh, good," with a glint in his eye. I hastily said, "Not that good!" He just gave me an enigmatic smile and a pat on the bottom. 

After dinner we were watching a re-run of The Big Bang Theory when he suddenly turned off the TV, held out his hand to me and led me to our bedroom. To my surprise, instead of sitting on the side of the bed he carried on round to the end. He hardly ever spanks there because the foot board is shaped, needing a lot of faffing about with a throw and pillows to make it comfortable. He did the faffing bit, then tugged at the belt on my jeans and told me to take them and my knickers off, whilst he selected his implements. He was most solicitous, bending me carefully over the bed, making sure my back was fully supported and in no danger of being jarred by his 'attention'. He remarked how taut my bottom was in that position and I reminded him that would make it hurt more. I suggested he should start with feathers, as it was a while since there had been any hand to bottom contact, and recited Cat's wise words: "Wood is no good, leather is better, feathers are best." That was to no avail and I soon had a hot bottom. It was a much-needed reconnection for both of us, with a lot of laughter in between the ouches.

I've had no twinges in my back the last couple of days and am cautiously optimistic that it has healed. I'd like to say life in the Jones household has now returned to normal but we have both caught the dreaded lurgy (upper respiratory tract infection, according to a doctor friend) that is doing the rounds in our part of the world. It's been over a week since it started and we are  fed up with it now and getting a bit tetchy. That may or may not be the reason I have an 'appointment' at 5 o'clock this evening...

Hoping to be back soon,

Rosie


Friday, 23 December 2016

'Tis the Season


... when tempers can easily become frayed.



Even the most angelic among us can fall from grace when pressure mounts up...



When your HoH looks like this




whatever you do, don't poke the bear.




Take a deep breath...





Picture some fluffy kittens...






or pour yourself a glass of wine. Well, it is Christmas after all.





Make sure the only goose that gets cooked is the one in the oven...






                   
    then all your spankings
     will be Good Girls
      (or Boys).

And on that happy note, all that's left to say is


from Rosie and Harry




Thursday, 8 December 2016

Once Upon a Time


Things have settled down here, we're slowly getting back to normal, whatever that is. The thing about normal is that life is uneventful, which means I have nothing to blog about. Instead of disappearing again, I thought I'd have some fun and write a story. This is a fictional tale but any resemblance to living people may not be entirely coincidental. 

Are you sitting comfortably? Then I'll begin...

Once upon a time, a little girl was born into a family that had not heard the patter of tiny feet for many years. Her grandmother, the family matriarch, had expressed her preference for a boy but, on holding the infant in her arms for the first time, declared that she wouldn't change her for a boy if his backside were studded with diamonds. The child was christened Rosamund on account of her fair English complexion, with her rose-coloured cheeks and rosebud mouth.

With seven grownups in the household twisted round her tiny fingers, it was almost inevitable that she was a little spoilt. She was treated like a princess by them all but her biggest fan was her doting Grandmama. The old lady wasn't a total pushover, though. She insisted on ladylike behaviour and taught Rosamund her Ps and Qs.

In spite of, or maybe because of, having three younger siblings, she grew into a somewhat solitary child, with her nose often stuck in a book. Though no hand was ever applied to her bottom, the little princess had a fascination with spanking, fuelled by the many instances in the story books of the day. By her early teens, she had begun to fantasise about being spanked, mainly by handsome men on horseback.

She was mistress of the witty put down and, as a consequence, found herself over the knees of two early suitors. She liked how it made her feel but neither of the young men touched her heart. Her Grandmama told her she was a very special girl who would need a very special man. She was biased, of course, but that's the way it is with Grandmamas. She advised the princess to carry on kissing frogs until her prince arrived.





And so it came to pass that a knight in shining armour came forth on his trusty steed, Lambretta, and stole her heart away. Sir Henry's kisses made her swoon, but before long she craved the thrill of a spanking and asked him to oblige. He was appalled. He had been to knight school with his peers and learned that a man's job was to care for and protect his fair lady. Only a coward would strike a woman. Rosamund was nothing if not persistent, chipping away until, in exasperation, Henry forbade her from raising the subject ever again.

Many years passed, during which the pair married and had two beautiful daughters.Their union wasn't all sweetness and light; this may be a fairy tale but they had their ups and downs like everyone else. Rosamund could be a handful when she didn't get her way and Henry's strategy was to keep his head down until her ill humour passed. In the meantime, doors would shudder on their hinges and no-one could pout or flounce better than she.

Their daughters had left to make their own way in the world long before the day that was to turn Rosamund's life upside down. Henry was gazing fondly at his wife, who was slumbering in the afterglow of some mighty fine loving, still clad in the *F--k me* outfit she had worn for his pleasure. She had fulfilled many of his fantasies over the years and it was to his sorrow that the only one she wanted for herself was the one thing he couldn't bring himself to do. Lately though, he had begun to wonder whether it was such a bad thing. A story had been written about many shades of grey, it's fame spreading far and wide, with its scenes of spanking setting feminine hearts all a-flutter. When Henry told Rosamund he was willing to try spanking, solely to add some extra spice in the bedchamber, she wasn't at all sure she wanted to after all these years. She told him she would think on it.

She dressed with great care the first time, choosing undergarments that would present an appealing target once her skirts were up and her knickers were around her thighs. Henry had always admired his wife's bottom, a little on the large side but smooth and firm. The last thing he wanted was to smack it but he had promised. Rosamund jumped when the first spank fell, out of sheer anticipation. Henry made himself deliver another twenty or so smacks, turning her bottom a warm shade of pink, before picking her up and carrying her to their bed.

The next time, to Henry's chagrin, she was left with some light bruising. Perhaps it hadn't been her brightest idea to mention pat-a-cake when he asked how she felt about the first spanking. She cared not a jot about the bruising, her worry was that Henry would not spank her again. What was she to do? There was only one thing for it, she would use her magic tablet to consult the Fount Of All Knowledge. Tapping three times on the glass to summon Google she asked her question. The answer came from a man who spanked his wife, avoiding bruising by warming up gradually with moderate smacks before the real spanking began. A few more taps led Rosamund to the Land of Blog, where she found many women who were spanked by their husbands, not only for pleasure but for discipline too. She passed on the warm up tip to Henry but kept the rest of her discovery to herself; she didn't want to put any ideas into his head.

Her deviousness was in vain for, once Henry accepted that spanking caused no lasting harm, it was only a matter of time before Rosamund was spanked for real. She had been in a foul mood all morning and Henry bore the brunt of her ill humour. When all else failed, he decided to spank her out of it. Rosamund was shocked to be summarily upended over his knee but knew she deserved it and was soon making her apologies. That day wrought a change in our trusty knight. With his soft, contrite, wife in his arms he vowed that, henceforth, he would brook no argument from his feisty princess. Peace and harmony would come to his domain, for now he had the means to rein in her waywardness. For good measure, he would give her frequent reminders of his new expectations, whether she needed them or not.

His lady wife submitted to her husband's strictures for she found them curiously calming and, by some alchemy, his strong leadership brought her and her knight closer together. That's not to say everything ran smoothly from then on; the princess could no more change her character than a leopard could change its spots. There were times when she would try her husband's patience to the limit and her hindquarters would feel the sting of his wrath. He knew he would never tame her entirely, nor would he want to. Life would be dull if his Rose lost her thorns.




Cue Happy Ever After music...


** I have used narrator's licence here. Harry is a benign dictator but were I to use the 
    f-word in real life I wouldn't sit comfortably for quite some time.


Rosie



Wednesday, 30 November 2016

I had questions, Harry had answers


Harry and I had a busy but productive three days over the weekend. First up was a trip to the Midlands, to inspect the work being done on our younger daughter's house. Then, straight from there to Cornwall at the other end of the country, to carry on helping with the renovation of the ancient cottage our elder daughter and her partner are doing up. It's coming on well, though there's still a lot to do. The phone signal is poor there and they still have no Wifi. No wonder BT has been rated below the banks for customer service.


Cornwall wasn't looking quite so lovely as on our previous visit -






Ah, here's a much better view -



Gratuitous photo for Meredith and me



Anyway, Harry agreed to answer the questions in Lilli's meme, so here's our shot at it...

 1. What is something I always say?
     Have you locked the back door?
     Yes, I say that a lot, I have a thing about it.

 2. What makes me happy?
     Going across my knee.
     😍

 3. What makes me sad?
     Getting up in the morning.
     I wouldn't say it makes me sad, I'm just not a morning person.

 4. How tall am I?
     5'7" 
     5'6"

 5. What is my favourite thing to do?
     Reading your iPad - can't keep you off it.
     Guilty as charged.

 6. What do I do when you're not around?
     Read your iPad.
     There is some truth in that but I do keep house sometimes.

 7. If I became famous what would it be for?
     Writing.
     In Harry's dreams, I could pen the next £1million best seller.

 8. What makes you proud of me?
     Your intelligence and good looks.
     Oh!
     
 9. What is my favourite food?
     Panna cotta.
     And crème brûlée.

10. What is my favourite restaurant?
      Hartwell House.
      A special place.

11. Where is my favourite place to visit?
      France - no, wait! New York.
      I love New York.
      
12. If I could go anywhere, where would it be?
      New York.
      See above.

13. How do I annoy you?
      Let me count the ways...
      No, let's skip that one.

14. What is my favourite film?
      A Good Year.
      France and Russell Crowe, what's not to love?

15. You get a phone call that I am in trouble, who will I be with? 
      Your Mum. She'd be the one in trouble, you'd be looking after her. (Pause) 
      Sixteen seconds. (Puzzled look) Sixteen seconds is the time it would take me to
      collect up the necessities and hit the road if you needed me.
      But would he remember to lock the back door?


Thanks to Lilli for sharing this meme.

Rosie




Thursday, 17 November 2016

Hide and Seek




Come out, come out, wherever you are! Don't be shy!



It's the eleventh annual Love Our Lurkers event, two special days when bloggers invite our silent readers to come out of hiding and say ''Hello". I was a long-time lurker, so I know the thought of making a comment can be daunting. The first time I made a comment I deleted it twice before summoning the nerve to hit the blue 'publish' button. But you don't need to do that, I'd love to hear from you and I'm really not at all scary, I'm more like this...




You don't have to give a name, you can be completely anonymous if you want to.




You can even ask me questions if you like...




So come on, be brave and make my day on Friday or Saturday, whichever one you choose.





Rosie